Sweet Sixteen and Never Been Kissed

Guest Post by Sara Willoughby

Last June I celebrated my sixteenth birthday. On the big day, I received the usual phone calls from extended family—my aunt, uncle, cousins, and grandparents.

On the phone with one of my grandmothers, I answered the usual questions and had the usual conversation. No, I didn’t feel any different. Yes, I was having a special day.

“So, I’m assuming that you’re sweet sixteen and never been kissed?” she eventually asked, half teasing. With a smile, I affirmed that she was correct.

It wasn’t the only time I’d been asked about guys or dating by well-meaning adults.

You know what? The fact that I have never kissed anyone is intentional. I’ve made the personal decision to save my first kiss for my wedding day. To save all of myself for my future husband.

Why is this? Because I know how important marriage is. Now, I’m not saying that you need to do the same thing I’m doing. That’s between you and God.

What I do want to point out today is, first, the incredible importance of marriage, and, second, why it is so important.

Marriage is a long way off for many teenagers. It doesn’t seem like something that we need to be worrying about yet. And while in some ways that is very true, in others, we are missing out.

Marriage should very much be a concern of everyone. Including teenagers.

Marriage is a picture of the church’s relationship with God. It is not to be taken lightly. It is beautiful and amazing, but it’s also holy and sacred.

Marriage is so important to the teenager first because, as Christians, we are already a bride. Though perhaps our wedding feast has not yet occurred, we still belong to God. There can be no other idols in our relationship with Him. It’s exclusive. Just as a earthly marriage is to be exclusive.

Which brings us to the second big reason that marriage concerns teenagers. Though the following verse describes the Proverbs 31 wife, I think that the idea can apply to both guys and girls:

“She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life.” Proverbs 31:12 (NIV)

All the days of her life. The foundations of a good future marriage are formed now. I don’t know about you, but I want to love, honor, and respect my future husband now, even though marriage is a long way off.

Giving myself to many other guys emotionally or physically now and then breaking up with them… that seems like practice for divorce to me.

Will we love whoever our future spouse is now by waiting for them? Even if you don’t know who that person is, even if you’ve never met them, or even if marriage seems like it will never happen for you? Will we bring our future spouse good, not harm, now, as we’re teenagers? Will we be faithful to them now?

So why is marriage so important? It’s so important because it reflects the church’s relationship with God. It is sacred and exclusive. Marriage is important -both for those who are not married and those who are- because it is a beautiful picture of our relationship with God.

There are so many parallels between the two, I think it would take up a book to share, but the Bible alludes over and over again to it.

Whether you’re married or not, God should be our first love.

As devoted as a husband should be to his wife, or vice versa, it should be ten times more with God. Single or not, are we delighting ourselves in God?

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Sara Willoughby is a 16-year-old girl who loves to write and have adventures. She is a TCK, a Lymie, and a B.R.I.G.H.T. Lights leader. She writes for Romans535Blog, FoundWhoIAm, and Th!nk Magazine.

Hey Girls! It’s such a blessing that we can encourage you in your walk with Christ, however, we are not licensed counselors and cannot offer professional advice. If you are seeking help and counsel, we strongly encourage you to talk to a trusted adult such as your parents, a godly woman, or a pastor. They can better guide you, as they are able to know the details of your situation.